Tiny Computers & Flight Attendants

1. Sarah Palin has reportedly chosen a collaborator to assist in writing her memoirs. Lynn Vincent, an editor for Christian conservative World magazine, will gut, clean, and prep the wolf carcasses while Palin works on the book.

2. Marvell Technology Group has developed a computer the size of an electric plug. The computer has no display but it does contain an Ethernet jack, a USB port, and of course tiny, asshole I.T. guys.

3. San Diego Padres pitching ace Jake Peavy has turned down a trade offer with the Chicago White Sox, citing his family as being the main reason, adding that he has nothing but great respect for the White Sox fan base. Analysts, however, say other factors played a role, none more so than Peavy's crippling fear of mullets.

4. President Obama and former VP Dick Cheney both delivered speeches on Thursday covering the issues of terrorism and the prison at Guantanamo Bay. Not surprising, the two men took noticeably different stances, but generally agreed on the need to protect America. President Obama was then driven home to the White House and Dick Cheney drove through a White Castle.

5. An Emirates Airlines' flight attendant was jailed for 18 months after he left a bomb hoax note in the aircraft he was working on. The resulting panic caused London's Gatewick Airport to be temporarily closed. The man was reportedly ashamed and embarrassed when his family and friends discovered he was a flight attendant.

High five.