Prejean Post Boobs & RNC Knocked Up

1. On Thursday, federal prosecutors aimed to seize four mosques and a New York Fifth Avenue building that is suspected of being "secretly controlled" by the Iranian government. Authorities have long suspected that Iran held the reigns to the Alavi Foundation, the organization in control of the aforementioned properties. The smoking gun though, say prosecutors, is the jellybean dish full of complimentary "stoning rocks" found in all Alavi buildings.

2. Former Miss California Carrie Prejean said in an interview with Christianity Today that she doesn't think there's anything wrong with a Christian girl getting breast implants. "I don't see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn't get breast implants," said Prejean. Well you miss a lot of things when your view is obstructed by enormous breasts.

3. BeautifulPeople.com, a dating site founded in Denmark in 2002 where only the most beautiful people are allowed to join, finally went live around the world last month. So far, Germans are considered the "ugliest" with only 15% of men and 13% of women being accepted to the site. "It's difficult to determine the ugliest nationality," say the site creators. "But you can't argue with the very exact science of Internet popularity."

4. It was revealed today that the Republican National Committee health insurance plan covers elective abortions, a procedure which the party's own platform refers to as "a fundamental assault on innocent human life." I haven't seen this much hypocrisy since Lou Dobbs ran that pinata factory.

5. A boy from Arkansas has gained national attention after refusing to stand for the pledge and telling his teacher to go jump off a bridge. "I really don't feel that there's currently liberty and justice for all," said 10 year old Will Phillips. Phillips says he feels that gays specifically aren't being given equal rights in this country, at least that's what it sounded like with his head dunked in toilet water.

High five.