Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Oh, Brothers!

1. The top Catholic educating order De La Salle Christian Brothers recently admitted to concealing abuse within their organization after documents were discovered by the AP.  The groups leader says they never intended to hide the truth, but that the documents were likely lost underneath a pile of alter boys.

2. According to a new report, former senate candidate Christine O'Donnell saved nearly $8 million from her campaign in anticipation of defending herself against lawsuits.  No word yet on who will sue O'Donnell but rumor has it there is a defamation of character lawsuit from the wizard Kragtor, Harbinger of Souls.

3. Microsoft today introduced a new privacy feature for Internet Explorer which they say will allow users to surf the web more securely and let fewer people see what they're doing.  The new browser works like this: whenever you log onto Facebook, your browser automatically transfers you to MySpace.

4. France's air authority says that 20% of Paris' airport flights will be canceled Wednesday due to impending snowfall.  However, climate scientists today released a statement saying that if you simply advance towards it, the French snow will quickly retreat.

5. A new study out of Australia shows that 40% of older men age 75 and up want more sex.  However, when reached for comment their wives could not be nudged awake.

High five.